Friday, April 17, 2009

Dear DD,

"Holy Fuck... I'm Pregnant." Yep that was me. That was my not so graceful reaction to you. Not what you were looking for huh? Well it's the truth. The Moment that strip turned pink all I could do was stare at it in disbelief. Yes you were not planned, you were something that happened, does that make me a bad mother? I don't think so. Twenty Months later I can't remember why i was not trying to have such a beautiful little baby.

Once word got out that i was pregnant all I heard from everyone was, "Are you ready for this?" It's a little late for oh my god i'm not ready. Like everything else in my life it was an idea that simply took getting used to, after that it was happy go lucky all the way.

We were not rich when we brought you into our lives, but we kept clothes on you body, food in your belly, and diapers on your butt. I loved you from the moment i felt you kick. I loved you before that i just did not now it yet.

Here i sit just days before your first birthday and i can't stop telling you how much I love you, how much you've grown, and that you are the very best part of this family. The initial reaction seems so long ago, like a distant memory. Now all i can say is where did my sweet little baby girl go? Who replaced her with this independent beautiful toddler?

You may not have been planned but I cannot imagine my life with out you. The best part of my day is when you smile.

Your Mommy


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